Is It Okay to Attend the Funeral of Your Ex-Spouse?

One question that many people have had is whether attending the funeral of their ex-spouse or ex-partner is the right call. This depends on a number of factors. Although making this decision can be quite tricky, there are certain considerations you should make before you decide to attend or not attend.

For starters, if you and your ex-spouse or partner parted ways on good terms and you still kept in touch with them and/or their family after the split, there isn’t any reason why it should be inappropriate for you to go. They were once among the most important people in your life who helped you shape who you are now, and you deserve the chance to say goodbye. On the other hand, if you had a contentious split or divorce, you should probably expect a different experience.

It is important to remember that your presence should be welcomed by the family members of the deceased. If you did not split on the best terms, there is a possibility that seeing you will only bring more pain and grief to the family members of the deceased. Moreover, even if you do attend the funeral, remember that you can’t sit with the family members because you are no longer family.

Another possible scenario is where you and your ex-spouse have children together. In such cases, it is critical that you are extremely mature about your emotions and put the needs of your kids first. Since you have a family with your ex-spouse, the dynamic has changed and there is more to consider. For instance, if you do decide to attend the funeral, it may not be the best idea to sit in the family section with your kids, because, technically, you are no longer family.

There is no direct answer as to whether you should or shouldn’t attend the funeral of your ex-spouse. It is all very contextual. What matters most is considering how the family will feel.

Thanks for reading,

Karen